I’m Not Ready…

I’ve always been an out of sight, out of mind type of person but with you I become more of an out of sight and I long for you with every fiber of my being type of woman. Just the thought of you entices me and I miss every single thing about you…almost every single thing. My soul aches at the thought of you touching another and, yet, I realize that we were once living in a fantasy. When you were mine we lived in a dream world – I was your escape and you were my hero. I allowed you to be your true self and you helped me to realize my greatness. Remembering the pure joy I received from your presence makes me weak and coupled with the consciousness of your absence I am left with an insatiable yearning. My heart continues to cry out for you, but I will not allow myself to be the one to give in and reach out. This suffering is a process that I know I must endure for if I fold we are sure to end-up in the same vicious cycle of me only being your refuge, nothing more. I must continue to embrace the pain of your leaving because only then will I become stronger; only then will I learn that I’m deserving of far greater than what you were giving me. One day I will realize that I can be that out of sight, out of mind woman again, but not today; I’m just not ready to allow you to leave my heart yet.

Peace,

Tiaundra Elise